The Last Hour
Birthmothers of Canada
One Hour Left ‘til I must let you go,
I stare at your face and silently scream “NO!”
“I miss you already”, I looked at you and said,
As I made sure to be careful of your soft little head.
You were simply perfect, 10 fingers, 10 toes,
Your Daddy’s eyes, your Mommy’s nose.
We couldn’t stop crying, your Grandma and me,
Our hearts were as broken, as broken as could be.
I wanted you Mackenzie, I swear that is true,
But I had to do, what was best for You.
I sobbed and stared, as the clock ticked on,
One half hour now until you were gone.
I started to think of the months before,
Then began to cry more and more.
I remembered then why my choice was right,
But I’ll sure miss your kicks in my belly at night.
Ten minutes now, and I begin to pray,
As I felt my heart be ripped out that day.
I prayed for your safety, your happiness and heart,
Then I told you how I’ve loved you, from the very start.
I prayed you’d understand that my love is true,
And this really was, the right thing for You.
There was a lot to that prayer, but now it is a blur,
Then I told my child, how much I’d miss her…
I swear I saw you smile that day,
As I wished to myself that you could stay…
But the time was up, as my heart broke in two,
I knew what it was that I had to do.
I thought to myself “How will I do this?”,
Then I handed you to Grandma with some tears and a kiss.
She told you she loved you and kissed your sweet head,
I don’t know about her, but I felt numb, almost dead.
I have felt dead since then, without you next to me,
But it’s all worth it, because you are so happy!
Much happier with your new Mom and Dad my princess, that’s true…
But don’t ever think, that we don’t miss you,
With all our hearts, Miss Mackenzie,
We are here and we love you…your FIRST family.
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